here you go,i do remember..because..this is the past

- As You Wish -
Whoever who wakes up first,text to the other one...
who might be still in sleeping mode...
Texting and miss calls and phone calls throughout the entire day...
Or you when you have your assignment and having me to text you as if i was accompanying you while burning midnight oil...even till late hours...
Trying all the best to sleep at the same time together,or asking me to watch the same movie with you although we are two different place..
Making sure i did watch it by asking what was happening now or after.
Before sleeping,one good night call..is a must and me telling you ghost story just to make you sleep instead has make you stay awake for even more longer hours.
The most funny part is where the call has to come to an end.
but non want to end it...and i've always promise to do it next time..but didnt.
Now i can tell you why,is because i will never willing to cut off your call..
Only you can do that to me :) thats the why.
Me making sure you at least drink some water during some hours..
due to the hot weather...but in the end...i think you were bored with my care?
But what about you then? when i was sick,having sore throat...
you made your 1st home made,chinese herbs for me and send it all the way to my working place although you have to rush back for assignments? :DD

Or do you miss the time when every single day you drive to my place?
or me going to yours?
Or when you bring your niece to my place during our 1st meet up.
and instead,i put focus on her rather than you and you gotten angry and jealous?
XD

i really appreciate the 813 handmade stars you made...
dont worry,is in my treasure box :P
i know how hard it is to make things like this,believe me..
i have some own experience too..hahaha...


from you.

You remember the time i was lying flat down on my bed and you quickly run over and grab a pillow to put it under my head just so i wont get any headache?
Or the time i was not sitting properly you put a pillow over my neck?
and the time i was doing assignment and you coming behind my back and massage my shoulders without telling.
and texting me,replying me,never ever delay as you know i will get worry.
and how you stop me from asking too much question?
you treated me well and i know you treat me as if im your everything...
You are daring but in reality,you are one of the most shy person i have ever met you know (yeah,weird..i know XD )
You let everything goes in my way so we wont argue..
You once told me
"i dont want to argue with you is not because im afraid we will break is because i dont have the heart to scold you,i cant even raise up my voice"
I still remember this from the day you said it until now! T_T
I asked you before,what do you wish from me... you said
"i only wish,from your heart,one day,even if you have a choice to be with someone else,you will still choose me because i made you happy"
Now,if i had a choice,maybe i wouldnt have been stupid in the past
(you're not stupid)
but hor,because of your caring attitude,always start up the arguement you know? you make others think they are special too.hate it.
(==")
but thank god,you are honest.this is something..that person dont have.
i dont know what was it like for now...have you change?
i cant even cry now,i have no more tears in my eyes.im all dry up.
if this is the end?

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

:O yahhhhhhhhhhhh! is not that i dont want to reply you.
but no point of giving fake hopes...
you know i still would care about you..
but like i said,this is the past,this are all memories in our mind..
i believe you can find someone who treats you better then me or better than the asshole you just dump.
Is just time that are all you need.trust me for this time.
hwaiting!! :DD <3<3<3

Goodbye?

From yesterday i have already feel that i was having a serious headache.
so yeah,went home,watch SNSD Happy Together with sister and off to bed.
Just this morning when i was in the car,i started to have this nausea feeling...
As if im about to puke any secs.
Reach work and do some stock cut while downloading some SNSD videos.

And the usual crazy of me...cant stay quiet of course (;
this is what i did



Nyahahaha,is Xuan's jacket aka maknae aku :P
since she's away for 3longgggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg days...
What is even funny is that,during my conversation with CK...although we are talking nothing about her...her name somehows TER-say out XD
(pls dont say we miss you :P )

Ok,1stly,i forget to bring my jacket so im using hers to cover my easily-get-cold-fingers.
then after that,i need to go office so i said to CK
"let's bring Xuan along" ck only manage to give THE look XD
i did lots of funny stuff as if the jacket was her...although CK is shaking his head but i caught him laughing..
i mean c'mon who can resist the joke im doing? (; kekeke


am i dying?
>.< i dont know...i somehow feels weaker and weaker each day...
i can feel my immune system getting weak..
I dont know how to say how i feel exactly...all i can say...
i feel my body temperature hot on the inside and cold on the outside.
unstable ==" and is not fever,i know how fever feels like.
*sigh*
what if i check DOC and end up it was nothing?
waste of money XD
i dont know...
but dont let me die now...let me travel to korea 1st!!
you guys must be thinking im crazy huh?
but yeah,if i am really dying...why not enjoy rather than worrying...
I dont like this sick feeling...feel like killing myself,man!

I still can joke and laugh around...that is because im trying to over come the pain...
but i have a feeling,i can faint anytime soon...
this is the same situation i had when i last fainted that cause my heart to stop a few secs..
this is the same feeling...im having now...

:| *sigh*

[7/12/2010] - [3:45pm]
" never knew what i should have leave or keep it until i have lost it..but its the past,you're going to say that right? cant believe i scolded you for over caring me,when just so i realize i need one person to do it like you does..i thought being with a new one,can replace you..but i guess that person cant reach your par...you're different..i dont know..you remember how much you always give it my way and i waws always right..because of this i thought you are the wrong one but until last night,i realize you always act that way pretend i was always right is because you dont want arguement to happen between us.. yea,stupid.thats me now. "

- all the best for you,you will have a better one in the future,trust me,because i knew you will be reading this,so i want you to know that although...i cant change my mind, i really still cares about you,if you need someone to talk to,i'll be there...cheer up,kay? i dont want to see you that way either -

unexpected

if only someone can see my reaction when i receive your text message.
for almost 2 years...no contact..no nothing..you find me at last..
someone have once again broke your heart?
*sigh*
i do not hope that happen though...but life still goes on,isnt it?

[everything is over,how come?why?can we meet now?can we talk? i need someone to hear me out. i need to let those tears out now.will you be there again like it used too? will you be there to calm me again although for what had happened?are you taking care of someone else now?will it be too weird for me to just sms you again..weird la,totally weird]

i read it over and over and over again..but i can never know how to reply you back.

[fine.i understand.let this be my mistake.bye]

i can be there for you,i can still care for you,i can try and put a smile back onto your face...

should i text you back?

Sad.Disappointed.Angry.

Sounds damn EMO isnt it? yeap,damn emo now...
But i think there is no point of me saying it out...AGAIN
Given you chances but you can never change do you?
Sometimes,i rather remain silent,i rather keep quiet not because im scare of you or dont care about it,but is because im sick of it...im sick of letting this type of things get to me...it sucks OK.
IM SICK OF YOU

But like my dad said,you can help people as much as possible,but you dont ever expect that person will treat you the way you treat them.
is true after all...i cant expect in any returns...
but what i hope was for you to appreciate the existence of our friendship..
and the things i have done for you.

tired.tired.tired

I havent been updating my blog for quite some time huh? :)
that's because i dont seem to have the right time to do so.
So,yeap.yesterday is my OFF day...and how did i spend it?
Sleeping until 2pm XD and cleaning up my room...
while cleaning up,i realize i need to re-decorate my room,my collectibles of SNSD
SO I DID
^^ hehehe,my sister was shock as she walk into my room she only manage to say one word
WOW (;
so,we both think is a good idea to make a video out of it and so i did :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYoyBkgngUA
ta-daa <3<3<3
now i love sitting at my desk for hours while writing my story.
Im not obsess but i just so happen to look up to tiffany very very much XD

Went to night market when drizzle about to start...
look for my phone protecting case but failed to do so...they claims it is still not out yet ==" geeeeez.
Pick my mum up and off we go back to home..
while on my way home,as usual,earphones are on..this time sharing one side with my sisters..
we eventually dance to a few songs and my mum asked my dad to see how the both of us is dancing in sync :P
Genie..OH..RDR..GEE and etc etc

what should i do now...im dead bored

[you said to me last night that you love me face to face,but you should know why i no longer answering you back,things change..i change]

zZzZzZ

you guys must be thinking "what's with the Taemin (SHINee) picture" huh?
oh well,that's just my hairstyle now,i decide to get my hair cut and i eventually taken this picture and save it in my camera and show it to the hair saloon.
But i seriously want to get my hair dye soon.. :(
Sis said to me : no more Hoot Hoot HOot...now is Hello Hello...
XD i crack up.

Lately i found myself gets tired very easily..is not that im lazy...
but my body is weaker than i thought nowadays.
I feel pain easily...fall sick easily...
getting old? o.O --> T.T

Told my dad that i might be going to KOrea soon,with my maknae (;
and my dad asked whether is there any guys following,i say NO..and he's like,just you 2 girls...are sure?you're not scare?
:) nope.
papa told me when he was my age he went to Japan..to work some more..
so he says,this time,he shall allow me to stay and work in korea for 3months.
me..alone?
i wonder if its possible...
Independent! i guess i will be alright? then should i have actually go for the trainee in YGE? ==" no no no...3years dont contact anyone...can die.
:P

Some people asked me before,arent you tired and bored with your job?
well,1st sure i will have a lil boredom at times..
But then,im very lucky to have my two close friends to work with me and time flies away. ;) that's the best part.
My boss,she's amazing,unlike any other boss...she's a very nice and caring and loving
but most importantly,she is very understanding. :)
isnt that nice enough...i mean,come on,what do you expect more...and is not easy to find bosses like this.

im lazy now,to continue update it XD

hoot hoot hoot

Yes....is very obvious,that im in love with HOOT the latest songs by SNSD <3
It keeps ringing in my head..the song keep repeating in my mind non stop and i love the dance,but then of course,i've learned it ^^ nyahahahaha..
i didnt learn it on purposely but is because i keep watching their performance non stop.

shall start writing again later..busy busy