SoshiSone1308 Updates: Yeongwonhi

Uh +.+ this is going to be one hell of an emo post.

So, skip it if you dont want to read it, but i need somewhere where i can spill out.

Lately, whenever i laugh with my colleagues, a few of them somehow manage to feel i wasnt feeling alright :/ i dont know how, maybe they have magical powers or something to read my mind?

they said "you are not happy are you? your eyes betrayed you laa"

well, im not good at hiding as i thought i am, but why should i hide my unhappy feelings?

No worries, i wont hide it anymore, i got tired of myself pretending that things are alright when its definitely NOT.

But is so weird, when someone ask you or wants to know why, i tell, and you gotten angry or pissed off at it, so what's the point of asking when you dont care about me? o.O right?

i dont fake my health issue just to get sympathy nor attention,

please, why would someone fake their health for that? maybe someone really does do so,

but i am so not in that category, it hurts most when you're in health issue and people say you fake it. you can trust to believe it or not, but dont say im making it up, cos i have no reason to do so.

honestly, i dont oppose but you guys are making it seems like i am doing so.

"we paused because you didnt support"

Stop throwing the blame on me, this is ridiculous, think about it.

Be mature about it, there's accepting or declining, its either way.

pause? really? lol.

I am not creating problems, but you are.

she realizes, when you have another you seems like you dont need me.

I dont think of it that way, but i do feel like we argue even more +.+

\(O_O)/ for only you and God knows why.

but honestly, if you guys happen to read this (FYI, you do know it, if you feel it)

I am emotionally because of my other stuffs, just dont think too highly about it, thinking it was you whom i felt bother with, dear me, no, is not you.

but if every single one of you, agreed that i was the problematic one in the group.

Remove me out of the picture, now, won't you guys be happier already then with one less problem, or should i think, i was the only problem? like how you said.

I am not stupid, but i realizes the surrounding myself too.

I very seng muk one, no worries.

one day....sooner or later, for i dont know when.

if you read this post feeling pissed off, that just clearly shows that you ARE angry of me.lol.

i need someone to hear me out, but is hard for me to spill out.

when i knew one of my friend is down, i quickly text them, letting them know

"IM HERE *waves*"

But when i was down, who was doing the thing i did, well, some did :x mianhae for i didnt know how to tell...i dont even know where to start.

are you saying "i did try to care, but you are the one who didnt want to tell idiot"

FYI, if you care for someone where's the patience?

"im very patience enough with you already! you are making me angry! i give up!!"

wow and you finally say it.

that's what we call, um, refer as, "do you really care? or just trying to make it seems like you do?"

I give my 100% to the ones i really love and really care about.

I am not saying they dont, some of them do :')

but the most, are only giving back a 2%

i dont expect to be getting a 100% but....well, just put yourself in my shoes.

Im done spilling out. not fully either.

i would tell you, if you sincerely and have the patience to know.

how can you expect someone who is really down to spill everything on the spot?

it takes time.

but right now, i dont even wanna talk about it anymore.

i am tough, but i am not a robot, cos i got feelings too.

and youuuuuuuuuuuu, thanks for being there! yes, you --> \(O_O)/

Hahaha! you know who you are ;))

she's the example of someone who really cares to know, she looked for me about a week, all i said was "sorry, \(O_O)/ i dont know how to tell"

i said that continuously for a week! and damn, that girl, she's an angel.

she understand why i cant spill it all out just that way and that i need time,

but never once,failed, in a day, she drop a message saying

"i wont be around, but i do hope your day is a better one today<3 cheer up"

those simple words, from a person i dont expect to care much (because i dont want to bother her) a person who has her own busy life and i just happens to be no one special, but her doings and sayings, makes me feel like i am someone in her heart after all and that she really cares.

No matter how close we are, i always know there's a small gap :)

but i was so surprise that this sleepyhead, can sit up the whole night just to talk to me, joke around...yes JOKE around, saying random things (TT TT! TT TT! cant you see the music)

XD yes, she manage to make feel happy at that moment, but i really appreciate how she make an effort to stay, the dark skies becoming light blue and us the next day, second thing we said after messaging one another "im off to bed, nights" XD too tired eh?

you really surprise me, because you are..well and i am... XD how can i say it without making it obvious?? XD damn!

but, really, nomu nomu gomawo, for everything, you make me love you even more!!!!!!!!

"did i manage to make you laugh? like really laugh and not just typing the words out?"

em....i guess so why?

" x( i thought i did *sits in one corner, spotlight on me* waeeeeeeeeeeee"

YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! XD im seriously laughing now!!! why are you so cute.

" ^^v yessssssssssssh ~~!!"

this simple simple things, makes things clearly of how cute you can be!

you are so unexpected, random! you surprise me so much that night.

best thing? i get to know you better, the real you..

:) you're jjang, you're daebak.

ILYJJ<3