Will You Marry Me?

are you ready?

The Dream I'll Never Forget

Yes, indeed is a dream that I will never forget.

*that is what my heart says, but since that I am freaking busy and stress, who knows when I'll forget*

So for the best, I decide to blog about my dream, in order when in future I reads about it.

I'll smile like how I smiled this morning when I woke up.

P/S: Keep in mind, dreams are where anything is possible, so some part may be a bit outrages but hey, like i said, is a wonderful dream that made me smile the moment I woke up.

It all begins with...

I was standing by a tall glass window, looking out at the airfield while people around me were cheering and waving frantically out of the window, there I saw entering the airplane, was Taeyeon followed by Seohyun & Sooyoung.

I remember thinking to myself 'damn, im going to miss seeing soshi's face' as I watch them enter the airplane, Sooyoung wave before entering with a beautiful smile on her face, you know her infamous lady smile :)

I turn around and I saw my two buddies there, Xian (Yoona bias) & Cynthia (Yuri Bias) they were...fangirling xD like this situation is fucking realistic. Once soshi disappeared into the plane, we gathered and said how we wish we could see them even more often and longer.

Somehow, we walked up the the security, I ask "Is the plane not taking off yet?"

"Nope, it will take off in 2 hours, a small delay" he replied.

"Can I see Taeyeon? Please, I promise I wont cause a chaos, I just want to talk to her because I do not know how long will I have to wait in years to see her again, this may be my only chances to be able to talk to her"  All my words were said in a begging tone, and surprisingly he nodded his head and took us to the airplane. (Told you guys dreams are where everything can be possible XD)

So together with my buddies we followed the security, there at the entrance of the plane, we saw Taeyeon (wearing a white furry jacket) resting her back against the seat, she looks peacefully, 

"Remember what you promised" the security reminded us and left.

We entered the plane nervously and went to Taeyeon.

I remember bowing to the leader, which made her look at me, shock at first but I think seeming I wasn't fangirling like nuts, she didn't mind, she smiled just a little to acknowledge my presence.

"Fan...Soshi Fan...Cho-nem, Sowon-ni-mi-da" 

I remember so darn clearly my desperate attempt to make her know my presence.

She mouthed 'O' but never really replied further.

Then I proceed saying, "I...really like you...Taeyeon, I really do"

This time her eyes widen, I'm sure she understand what I just said in simple english, because she smiled and blushed, nodding her head while saying "dae~dae" and sat up straight in her seat.

"Taeyeon-ah, selca juseyo?" my hands trembling, reaching into my pocket as I pull my note3 out.

I took the first selfie and wasn't happy with the slight blurriness, until Cynthia came behind me and pat me on the shoulders.

"Oi!! Your Tippani is at the other check in point!! Dont you want to see her??"  the tone of her voice all excited. I remember smiling to Taeyeon again as I bow and rushes off with Cynthia leading the way. We reach some certain place, where I believe is the waiting area, the place is huge and filled with more seniority than young adults. Cynthia then pointed to the crowd somewhere.

"Neh...kan dao mei yao?"

which means, "there...did you see her?" in mandarin (its fxcking real, cos we do communicate in mandarin =_=) and I was standing on my toes, trying hard to catch a glimpse of the direction where she is pointing at and I kept telling her, "mei you! mei you leh! Nani!!" very frustrated actually, and it meant "where got? I dont see her, she's not there! Where!!"

Xian tap my shoulder and stood next to me and point again, "Ni kan...pink color de yi-fu"

and that means, "You look again, the one in pink color shirt" as she was pointing to the crowd.

From there, i spotted a girl sitting alone among a few of the crowds on the waiting bench, she was just chilling there.

Brown hair, slightly curl on the middle till end.

Had her earphones on, her phone in her hands, she was paying no attention to the crowd.

I remember Xian and Cynthia was saying WHAT YOU WAITING FOR! GO!! and they ran towards where she is sitting at, while I was making my way there with trembling knees I swear.

The nervousness was no joke, it felt realistic. I saw a few fangirls not far from her, but not approaching Tiffany either, idk why, probably respecting her privacy but they were flashing camera at her >.>

The moment I was close to her, I saw Cynthia and Xian talking to her a bit, like they were telling her about me (being the crazy ass fangirl of Tiffany's) LOL. Because as I was right next to her, Tiffany turn around and smile to me.

"Oh hi..they were just telling me about you" In her OH-MY-GOD-BEAUTIFUL-AMERICAN-ACCENT x_x it felt like I died awhile, but regain my life again because having a conversation with her is more important at that moment.

I went on my knees and just keep looking straight into her eyes, I felt speechless that she was actually just right in front of me, looking back right into my stares and she never once stop smiling, "Tiffany...I'm sorry, but...pardon me...for being...silly right now, not talking to you...is just urm, this is my dream, to see you up close and have conversation with you...wow this is unbelievable" I sigh, she smiled even brighter. (yes, you idiot, this is indeed just a dream that you have been dreaming for)

"Aww, don't be that way, come on, get up" she took my hand to pull me up onto my feet and guide me to sit right next to her.

"Why are you not on the same flight as Taeyeon's?" i ask.

"Oh, she's heading back to Korea, I'm going back to LA" Tiffany answered, "You saw her?"

I nodded, "I even took a selfie with her" nervously I fish my phone out of my pocket, but wtf the phone I took out, wasn't mine, it was a note1, probably belonging to my sis, then I remember I was scolding myself, I was frustrated at myself, how can a note1 take better pictures than note3. Now that I am sitting next to my only idol, probably I could take selfie with her, but I'm left with this shitty phone??? (No offense to anyone who is using Samsung Note1 reading this, I previously used it and gave my sister when I got myself a Note3)

"What happened?" she asked.

I shook my head, but I guess I look upset, because she was staring at me, "No, I just thought I could take a good picture with you...but the phone...the camera-"

"Is okay! My flight is in another 4 hours, we can take many good ones" she winked.

I died mentally again.

Then Cynthia whisper by my ear, "Hey, hou mien yao yi ke Disney dian...dai ha chu la"

It means, "Hey, there's a disney shop behind, offer her to go there"

"Fany ah, can I get you something? ...a candy, or anything you like...that can keep you company on your flight" all this in my most nervous tone.

She nodded her head and we headed out, while i saw many fangirls were wondering who the fuck am I xD that Tiffany is following with. Then I lean over and saw Cynthia walking on Tiffany's left side, AND HER ARM WRAPPED AROUND TIFFANY'S SHOULDER. 

sorry Cynthia, if it comes to my woman, I'll be jealous, even though you are my best friend xD.

"Oi! Your hand" I glare at Cynthia and hit her hand a bit, hoping she gets the message.

"Whatttttttt~ She don't mind what, hor Tiffany?" Cynthia grins while I frowned.

Tiffany turns around to look at me, she then hook her arm with mine and intertwined our fingers together, "There, does this makes you feel better?"

I was blushing, too happy to even reply but nodded my head.

Her hand in mine, everything was being way to realistic.

"Tiffany, are you feeling cold? Your hand is slightly cold and your fingers are really long like the fans said" I giggled and she laughs at the question.

We entered the shop.

Xian and Cynthia went around to find all the pink stuffs they can >.>

"You sure you want to get me those stuffs here? They are kind of pricey though..." said Tiffany as she picks up a few pink keychain, smiling at it. I went over and grab it from her.

"This is once in a lifetime, I don't mind, I probably only get to do this once only"

I stood at the mug section, where there's a unicorn printing on the pink mug, "This is cute, Fany do you want this?" she rush over to my side, leaning her head side ways as she looks at the cup, and she smiled. No need for an answer, I grabbed it. After everything was purchased, I head to the counter while Tiffany is still looking around.

Cynthia was standing by side as we look at the cashier scanning all the items picked by Tiffany in the basket, I remember leaning into Cynthia as I whispers "hey, if I not enough, borrow me a few hundred? Please, I will pay you back once we get home" she said okay, no problem at all to my relief.

The total is RM870.95

and the both of us were like WHAT THE FUCK WHY SO EXPENSIVE ONE, i took out RM500 from my wallet and is left empty, so Cynthia and Xian help to cover the remaining balance.

We went our way back to the seats where we saw her at first.

She tap the vacant seat beside her when she looks at me, so I sat next to her.

"Thank you, you're really sweet" she said.

"Is you whom made me sweet" I replied.

(Then I hear the alarm of my handphone ring - like, seriously, the real alarm in reality is ringing)

"I think I'll be going anytime soon, Fany-ah, is a pleasure to meet you this upclose, you are amazing...I dont know when I'll ever have this chances again, will I dream about you again if I keep thinking about you before I sleep?"

(^ omg wtf is that)

Tiffany shrugs her shoulders, "If you miss that person you love more than enough, I'm sure you'll dream about them...we'll see each other again, don't worry, just go" she smiles encouragingly.

"You know I'll still love you no matter what are the news that came out in the past and maybe in the future...."

and I woke right back up to reality.

Wow..

And I smiled the whole time from the moment I woke up, I rushed downstairs, wanting to share this great dream, but she was sleeping.

But wow, certainly, Tiffany made my morning :)

Thank you, God.

Dont judge me for being happy :p

overdose

I used to think who cares what is going on inside of my body.
And i am those who can actually bear a lot in any kinds of pain.
Because I have a very low blood pressure, I can easily be strike with a severe headache and taking painkiller is my most reliable ways of pushing the pain awhile for temporarily.
I start by taking panadol then double the dose as 1 does not work for me anymore and slowly I switch to Ponstan a stronger painkiller.
It works like brilliant in the beginning but heck again I relied too much on it (probably taking them at least twice a week) slowly the effect was useless and my pain remains.
Like i said..i am tough enough to bear through many kinds of pain, but it was so severe that it is practically costing my time. It made me hold my work back as I could only lie on bed. Shutting my eyelids tight enough to slowly fall asleep and hopefully sleep through the pain.
Went to the pharmacy and I was introduce to Caffox. A strong painkiller to be taken along with Ponstan and damn I felt happy to have find anothet new buddy that could relief my pain.
(Have also tried Synflex and lots more others that you can find the name in google under 'best painkiller for headache' cos i would just jot down the name and head to the pharmacy for it)
I can bear with the pain but at most time I would prefer to be pain free. Who in the world want to be in pain?? Not me that is.
But if you're smart...you can probably guess it by now, the effect was slowly wearing off and not effecting fast enough. Like it can only make the pain go mild not gone but just mild.
So double up the dosage and my parents is keeping their eyes on me as they felt my dependence on painkiller is becoming a serious matter =_= maybe it is but hey if it can take my pain away..i seriously dont mind.

But because of overdosing with painkillers...there goes my stomach lining becomes thinner than it usually should :/ so now i easily have stomach pain (yes it become serious too) but then the other way to have that pain goes away...its just extra painkiller for the stomach pain to kiss my ass goodbye.
I think if I take a picture of my medication kit...you will be surprise to see how many kinds of painkillers i have and they are all at the highest mg :x

This happened before CNY this year or i think its during the 1st day of CNY. I woke up with a very painful headache coming from the side of my head. Somehow I realize the left side of my eye black out half of the side...urm...like you try to look at something without turning your head around and just moving the pupil? Yeap. I did that and it was just dark instead of visual...i never panic at that cos I was assuming it was due to the sunlight(?) Phone screen(?) Or TV that i was watching..and its gone when the headache left.
Until.
Yesterday.
I woke up. Severe migraine. My left side of the eye went completely blur. That was when I think is not okay to just to let it be. Took a trip to the medic. She say I may have a vein damaged but she dont dare to simply make a decision as she is not a specialist. So she recommended me to go to the hospital for a whole check up instead.
But then really...I guess I just have to wait a bit more and see how this blur eye goes if i ever have the migraine in the future.
Perhaps it is just the timing?
Idk.
Bottomline.
Do not get yourself overdose.
Not only on medication but love too.
:p
Life is too short to worry to much about yourself.

2015 - Hello...

Hello 2015, okay, I get it, I am updating like in the second month of the year. Dont blame me, I'm bloody busy ._. OTL fml~

Actually, I was hesitating whether should I or should I not post the last post before this.

But hey, no names are mentioned, *whispers* but you know who you are.

LOL, yeap.

I think I need to find some free time to only continue my blog as I am now clearly blank *-*

Too stress with work that's why.

Peace out. Be back when I can.

Praying hard that 2015 will be a good year for me *please*

Throughout the years, I've met lots of people.

Today, it's a bit different, I am a bit agitated by this person's attitude.

I pondered if I should even blog about this.

Okay, to save this person's image, names shall (try) be kept unknown.

This lawyer (well, soon to be) came to join us, being in the same branch with me and a primary friend of his who also happens to be my old schoolmate during high school is in the other branch.

I'm going to cut this real short, but the juicy point should not be left out ;)

So what happened was, this fella, he was transferred in between branches twice.
Finally after a week, he was remained in the same branch as me.

It wasn't long when he starts to show signs of having interest in me.

I'm not even trying to be funny but guys can be very obvious with what they want at times.

He begin by asking me out for movies.

but hey, anyone who knows me, knows i would avoid going for movies.

I think I have even stated that before of to why i dont go to the movies.

LOL.

and also because i got the obvious hints, im trying not to let him think that he has the chance.

Here's the question.

Do i have no feelings for him?

Yes.

Yes as in i do not have any feelings for him.

None.

And before any of you starts counting (judging) how long I have been single.

Here's the latest news: I'm still happy.

CALL ME TIFFANY HWANG!

Ok, back to the topic.

I think what pissed me more is he is getting this involve and let it affect our work?

Like I would ask him to do his tasks properly, he'll reply me "I love you"

and if I ask when is he coming back to office, "You miss me already?"

Okay, some of you may sees it as a joke.

But hey, it is bothering me and my job flow.

Like please be serious.

Have a little self respect and for me a bit.

If you like one person, you shan't make them feel discomfort in any ways, cos that wont be call love then if you do.

He even does this in front of my other two female colleagues (his friend included) which I feel really awkward and embarrass. Is just plain not cool.

I've met several guys in my life that opens my eyes a lot.
But I will just give a few examples that really surprises me most from their way of showing their interest.

There's one where sometimes i feel happy hanging out with him, but because of his persistence that slowly changes into an aggressive ones, like asking my whereabouts, from hour to hour, what was I doing. The care that they want to show, is proving how bothersome they are in the way they pesters me. Is like. Im not yours, so back off and stop acting as though I'm yours.
Basically, I thought we could maintain a friendship-relationship. But nope. Guess that didn't work that way, since he can't get me, he decide to become all nasty and rude towards me (even when we are still in the friendzone) His attitude become very nauseating for me and my friends to see, so we called it a STOP.

Then there is one that shows affection in person, like he would be really really soft when he speaks to me and it was pretty obvious, when he asked, I rejected, he actually told me "if you rejects my feelings, I'm afraid that is kind of hard for us to continue as being just friend" which really, I have no choice but to let go of this friendship cos...I can never force myself to give a try to a relationship when I have 0% ok- 0 is kind of harsh, but I do know how to differentiate feelings and what I want.
So yes, we eventually stop contacting one another.
Both moved on with no awkwardness.
Surprisingly, he text me last month to ask me to join him for a late drinking session.
at first i didnt know who text me, but seeing how he call me by the nickname (which he is the only who does) I knew it was him, but late night is a no no for me (busy lah)
LOL.
I'm glad that he took the initiative to text me, that shows i am still a bit part of his friend list.
But i hope us hanging out wont make your girlfriend uneasy.

One more.
Well, he didnt directly confesses to me.
But he actions says it all, he is caring and very well aware of my emotions.
LMAO.
His friend is the one who told me about his feelings towards me.
I think I don't want to share this out, because if I share out what he did for me, things can become pretty obvious and it might cause awkwardness HAHA
(P/S: if you are reading this, dont so perasan ok? I might the perasan one i guess LOL)
but this one right here.
He is still a part of my gang cycle, well at least, he has never (maybe?) made me feel uncomfortable before.

Okay, I'm getting goosebump just by sharing this.
Back to this colleague.
There are guys where they knew they were being rejected, they start texting you emotional text.
Indirectly hinting you that they are unhappy >.>
Gee, such a wuss.

My Stress FREE day w buddies

I'm just going to cut this short and fast?

Haha, basically I am so darn busy with work.

If you want pictures, please just visit my ig(?)

LOL.

Even on ig, there's only two pictures.

Since we enjoy ourselves more than we whoring around in front of the camera xD

So, the early plan for this outing, we are all pretty stress from works and studies.

Where to head when you feel stress and you want to be a kid all over again?

SUNWAY LAGOON!!

I know, I went there like not long ago, probably in the month of August? July? Not very sure.

/short term memory lost alert/

But who cares! Like if you go with the right people, anywhere can be a great place.

So, on 18/10/2014, Andrew decided to pick me up from my place @ 730am, he is pretty on time this time (okay, most of the times laa) /claps hands/ no no, he was like arriving before 740am(?) if im not mistaken because I am super duper hyper allergic to people who cannot be on time.

Pick me up and we head on to pick CK up :D then off we go to Klang to pick the two xiao jie(s) up as well then off we head to our fun destination.

I guess luck was on our side as Groupon had this discount of purchasing two tix at the price of RM120 (per tix w IC is RM90) so yeah. we saved ourselves a whole RM30 (not bad eh?)

Actually i wanted to give myself a halloween night of try for the night themepark, but the two girls are saying they are afraid, so we skipped that.

P/S: I DONT EVEN GO FOR HAUNTED HOUSE! but lol, the sudden wanting(?)

We start our ride with VUVUZUELA my favorite ride and it was CK's first time riding it.

I made him promise to scream like a girl xD and we did.

After Vuvuzuela ride, we head for Vuvuzuela AGAIN xD and he said he felt no difference.

-_-

well, Sunway is kinda boring because of the limited rides. TBH.

But hey, once in awhile, you need to release the inner kid of you out okay.

And we did, throwing sands at one another, seriously, thinking back how we played with the sands...

that scene, i can laugh all over again.

That day i actually laughed and trip on my butt and kept on laughing until my friends was like O_o are you okay??

We were wandering around, wondering what ride we should go since we skipped Flying Fox (due to long queue) we happened to see the Wave Pool having this Fire Eating acts going on, caught our attention we just go to the closes we can to the stage.

All of a sudden the host announces there will be music and DJ after the acts.

Guess what.

We actually dance in the wave pool for 2 hours (plus) straight.

It was kinda new to us all, and every time the DJ starts a new song, we would start by splashing one another (even the strangers besides us) like CRAZY!! Then jumping up and down like crazy, is like clubbing in water xD

Or else how can we dance all the way for 2 hours straight till rain downpours~

What happened in the Wave Pool Party was this two girls standing next to me, we were splashing around until i turned my back against from CK who is splashing me nonstop, I saw this Arab fella actually stick his body close up to the chinese girls, but because the situation was kinda 'messy' you can really do anything but to expect being touch/molest by others who take advantages of the situation.

I took initiative to whisper to one of them whether they know him or not, they said no, so I actually got Andrew's helped to stand beside the two girls to block them off from the Arab guys. 

It did the trick :3

Omg, my muscles are still sore till today, it's like 2 days already.

And I'm getting a lil lazy to blog :p

But the best part is that we went for another last round of Vuvuzuela under the raining hard condition.

Damn that feeling is NICE :D

I'll be back to blog, back to work.

Miss my buddies already :(

The Parents.

Often, children writes on their view towards the parents nowadays.

I'll twist that plot today and do otherwise.

No, goodness no, thankfully, I aint a parent to any babies/child yet (lol) hence I am writing this through a witnessing experience.

It may or may not sound logically but therefore this just the bits to my pov.

So, to any critters or buggers who may dislike this, calmly click the X button on your tab.

I for once dare say MOST teenagers/children claims that they are not treated well or fairly therefore here comes their rebelling.

Is that fair though?

To 'revenge' your way through by disobeying them, doing anything and perhaps everything that could be going against their advice thinking-

"HECK! Who cares about you man, this is my life, when I surpass my legal age, I do whatever the fuck I want and you cant control me"

Then I can definitely categorize you in the inhumane category.

For once, if you can have such selfless thoughts, use that whacky brain of yours and give your so call good thinking head a hit on the wall to at least make your brain works for ONCE(!)

What do your parents owe you in your life that you must mistreated them or hurt them this way?

We can be really naughty and can be shouting or arguing back with them at times but never once they neglect us when it comes to time when we really need help. 

When you were just a helpless toddler, who helped you give your way through? Who helped you to grow up and live till today?

WHO?????

Back when we were just a baby, when our cries triggers the panic alarm to our parents, they dont just go "oh what the fuck you want? We just fed you. Ahh. Who cares a measly baby? We have done our part of job as a parent. Cry all you want"

Who has taken care of your minimal of at least 17 years of your life has never ask for a repay back.

And now that you reach some certain age where you become dependable on your own our you think you have someone you can rely on and that it is enough, you decide you do not need your parents anymore, you selfishly do up those bastard acts that could hurt and wound your parents and you dont even give a damn on it, oh wow, how satanic. 

If you cant give back the same amount of love they have given to you, then please at least dont be so cruel to them? They are humans and your parents as well.

Yes, at times your parents my never satisfy your needs on the materialistic sides. Hence it may be the amount of siblings you have or most probably the problem on the fortune side.

You should be more clear of the situation in your life than others who are just bluntly listening to your unsatisfied needs on sided and just talking you into words of support that you WANT to hear to satisfy your anger.

And there you go thinking your friend/bf/gf knows you better than your own parents.

But have you ever talk to your parents?

You ask how can you cos its your life and it is supposed to be kept hidden and away to your fam bam, oh i see, an answer to your very own questions and doubts that you could probably ever have and you think there is no need of asking or sharing with them cos you already have the answer on your own.

See where the error comes from?

It's YOU.

If being a parent is so damn easy, sex should be done by everyone daily.

(lmao)

Why do you think condoms are made?

You think bringing up a child will be an easy peasy job?

How dense are you youngsters nowadays.

Once again.

Im not claiming all the youngsters category in the whole world. This is just my pov.

A mothers birth is a pain that could not be properly describe.

A fathers duty on the responsibilities of making sure of you growing up well on the meals he can provide is not easily be taken up for the challenge.

All they ever wants was you to not hurt them in anyways in return.

Is it that hard though to appreciate someone who has taken care of you? Someone who has did something for you because they want to make sure you grew up healthy and alive and probably biggest request they ever wants back is not to send them to the old folks home in the future or the tiniest request is to at least not hurt them?

They are not like your girlfriend who just came to satisfy your needs in your life and wants stuffs/money from you in return.

They are not like your boyfriend who probably says and do all the nice nice things that pleases you so they could please themselves in your pants.

For once.

Dont just think about yourself.

Think about your parents.

They could have scolded you for a good reason or sometimes stress from income or jobs can causes them to be a balloon that will burst even with the touch of a feather..

Do not think just from your side of thoughts as a selfish acts. Think from the whole.

What and how you will feel.

If you say I could it do it a whole lot better than what my parents are doing and giving to me right now.

My applause for your immature mind that just loves to brag at something that is still unreachable to you yet thus even close to that.

No, I am not a perfect child to my family.

I still argue with them at times when I think I am not wrong, or answer them back that could lead into hurting them but all of these could be avoided if I could take a step back before taking a step forward without thinking with fairly thoughts. But today, I dare say I have nothing hidden against my parents. Nothing hidden if revealed could wound and hurt them.

Dare you say the same?

I'm just a person at the age of 24...perhaps to have or not have a kid of my own in the future.

Think.

If your future daughter or son do the same to you of what you did today behind your parents back, will you be OKAY with it?

I do not know if I am getting more mature bits by bits as i aged.

And maybe is also because the loss of my previous two pets made me realize what death really means and why appreciation exist in dictionary.

If you did something real wrong.

And you yet cant feel any guilt pangs in your heart congrats on being close to a satan child.

I knew I didnt heard wrongly.

I knew I remember clearly of what really happened.

Because when it happens..

Im shock that you can be that rude to me.

A person you said cherishing the friendship with.

If I alone who says...you can say I made the mistake.

But two other people than myself. Heard and saw what you say and did too.

So what now?

They are liars too?

Cos they are my friends?

Lol.

This will be the last i talk about this.

Because for the first time in life.

I wish...we have never met.

joke of the day

"SHE'S TRYING TO BREAK OUR FRIENDSHIP"

Omg. I laugh so hard hearing so.

Why do i need to try?

When people know you long enough, you will show your side that everyone surely dislike and you will live pathetically wondering what or why people dislikes you.

You know whats your problem?

Being a guy but acting like a bitch. That is the problem(!)

Hello, idiot. If it wasnt for me. Do you think you will know so many sones? And her?

Please dont be funny.

How old are you retard? Still studying in kindergarden? Lol. Some more taking engineering course but acting like a 2 years old.

If i can control people's mind. I would have have you slapping yourself.

Idiot.

All your saying just proves how idiotic you are.

She's 24.

She has live old enough to know who is right who is wrong. Who she can trust and who is the idiot.

I trust she is not as dense as you.

Hahahahahahahahaha. Idiot.

Hahahahahahahaha.

Childish Asshole

Ooh...im blogging again(!) So. Someone said why got problem have to blog?

Actually. The answer is: "None of your fucking business right?"

The trip tremendously shows me a lot(!)

During the trip. I trust we may accidentally hurt or offended each other unknowingly.

For me likewise. 

Since i am very sensitive...i am aware of my friend's reaction every single time after i talk or reply them. And at the end of the day...i would apologize upfront if i did or not hurt them without realizing.

So after i blogged. Drama begins.

First, he admitted that he has bad assumptions on us..he say we will for sure boycott him and ivink.

^ people...this is how immature arse thinks.

I admit. When we were chatting. We was like, "what if that two are in their own lil world? Wont gua...this is outing...outing means to enjoy with each other..."

Which is the truth. If we isolate one another...what is the point of the whole trip?

So for him or them like he referred.

Us boycotting them.

It means even before they met us...they have this bad thinking applying in their mind already.

I blog. I came forward. I confront.

Because i think we deserved an apology for the inhumane things you did.

But then again.

People with dense english would most probably not able to imply my english. No. Im not saying my english is amazing. I used the word dense.

And when they are dense and angry.

They just simply answer questions to themselves. Which was HILARIOUS for me.

"I want to maintain a friendship. I appreciate us being as friends?"

^ wtf? You have bad thoughts about us but want to maintain relationship.

Selfish.

There is so much more.

But.

Why should i?

Im not losing anything that mean something to my life.

Not worth it.

Boycott my ass.

Andrew got my tantrums a few times.

I even scolded him.

But i felt comfort for telling him dislikes face to face. Show him i am unhappy of what he did or says or think. But then? We still hehe haha the next minute.

How come i can throw my emotions freely at him? Cos he is a guy not a boy who keep grudge in the heart. He is those type cincai laa..

Which kinda bother me at times. Cos it feels like he doesnt care. Lol. 

An immature boy will acts like a baby.

A kid who dont get the ice cream. Sulks and when people say they did this or that wrong..

They deny deny deny deny deny.

Sulking.

Yelling.

Throwing bad words around.

A guy who keeps grudge in their heart is a guy who is never mature enough.

Being mature means to come clean and solve.

Not bad mouthing behind people's back and pretend to maintain a friendship thereafter.

Bottomline.

If a trip can show me who is friends and who are not. I think its a whole lot worth.

At least i didnt waste extra years treating someone as a friend when they obviously dont care.

Boycott?
Who is the one isolating himself at one corner?
Who is the one pulled himself out and decide to do every thing himself?
Outing means you need to be initiative and start mingling around yourself to be in the group and not expect everyone to come and talk to you first.
Who the fuck you think you are that people need to go and talk to you 1st?
Even a two years old baby dont need that kind of guidance. How old and immature are you?
Boycott. Lmao(!)
Get your english right.
We boycott you or you already planned to boycott us in the beginning??

Hari Raya Holidays

I hasnt blog for awhile now, an off day today..probably a time to update how I spent my holidays.

So it was all a very planned trip by a few weeks earlier before it happens.

I thought things will go smoothly, but nawww- people are born with spoilers at times.

Heck, now i think my sensitivity detection has become a bigger roaming, that I admit.

Why not I begin?

We all started by meeting in USJ cos Cyn finishes her work at 7pm. Andrew picked me up at 5pm after picking Nogy up, hell, I do the last minute rushing packing OTL and yes...I forgotten about my towel. Fml lol.

Then off we go to USJ to pick xian up then head to USJ City Mall...but halfway there, i was talking about the previous trip that i went to sunway lagoon without my IC and was being charged for RM120 instead of RM90 (If you are a malaysian..please dont forget about your ic) Okay..probably is very minimal to have people like me =_= 

Andrew realized he had forgotten about his IC hence a big turn to head back straight to his place. 

Earlier on around close to 3pm I have texted Ivink since she is coming down from Sekinchan with Jy..she said their journey has just begun.

One more thing, I am those kind of peasant who is really genuine about my feelings when it comes to being punctual. For me. You either stick to the time that was planned or if you knew there could be jam or anything, work it with your time management. Do not let your dates got hanged up or waits you.

Cos is just fucking disrespectful.

But then. They were never late..they reached earlier (so early that time didnt makes any sense because to be reaching so fast) and we too was never late. Xian said she was busy and we headed to the store to get some liquids while waiting for cyn since she called.

met up and off we go for our dinner at Uncle Jang which Andrew suggested.

everyone's 1st time x3 and we ordered something which we cant enjoy due to the spiciness =_= everyone was hissing in spiciness with every bites. Regrets regrets. Cos everyone got a painful stomach in the end.

after dinner..we rush to aeon big to get our snacks and also booze for the trip...trying to make our curious youngest potato maknae to grow up...made her drink the most safest booze...

Hoegarden.

a bottle herself. Kkkkk.

but sadly...she cant join our trip this time around...so we send her home to klang.

on the way to klang..we got caught up a bit in the jam... Ivink called to say she and jy will head up to Genting 1st..

(TODAY'S BLOG IS ALL ABOUT HONEST REAL FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS. READ IT WITH YOUR OWN GUTS IF YOU ARE PART OF THE TRIP MEMBERS)

When I heard that excuse to 'skip' the jam where else we call this an outing/friends trip.

wtf was that?

You cant wait in a minor jam and decided to just break off with the trip and head to Genting yourself alone first? 

Oh...very nice indeed. Even the youngest also said "arent outing means we are supposed go stick together?"

Guess its not in everyone's POV. But i maintain quiet because I was actually beginning to feel rather pissed but I wouldnt want to ruin anyone's mood. As I am known to be angry quite fast at some certain times.

stayed at Genting..sunrise..sleeping in the car wasnt pleasant especially when Uncle Jang is still hanging around in your tummy LMAO.

andrew's gps was out off battery.

so i decide to split the task.

andrew's car to head to hotel check in and jy to go pick shirly up at 10am.

Thank You to Ms. Jacqueline whom is known as the Sales Marketing Director...she allowed me to check in at 10:13am!!! How awesome is she???

^_^

So its me, Andrew, Cyn and Nogy the first group that checked in... they all start lazying around until Andrew and Nogy calls it HUNGRY lol..

andrew said to tell Jy and the rest to meet at 1Utama for our (planned) buffet meal which starts at 12pm till 3pm++ Shabu10.

but Ivink called to ask us to wait at the hotel instead because they can make it within 40mins to reach the hotel then we shall only go to the buffet together after they reach.

Ignoring the fact that our stomach was growling.

we waited as said.

they came around 12pm++

Jy came to me and said "Why not skip the buffet? Then at 3pm we can head to Ecurve (escape room game) and maybe after the game we can eat our dinner? Lets skipped lunch since everyone is sleepy and tired..."

I just nod my head..seeing indeed is a bit true.

but then. Andrew's stomach were growling and so were mine. Nogy was out for a phone call so i woke Cyn up and she too was a bit hungry (1pm+) 

below our hotel is a shopping mall and I knew where we could get Hot n Rolls. 

So i went to Ivink and ask what would she like.

Her reply:

"Anything. Because I am still full. Me and Jy had our lunch already"

I was stunned and so was andrew when he over heard the reply...

in conclusion..the fact that we already planned this trip and food earlier on...you both despite the obvious fact in this case are very inhumanely selfish cut the food plan off WITHOUT telling us the truth that you already had lunch and we had waited with empty stomachs and you KNEW we are.

how nice of a friend you both are. Really.

but our trip was long. So i shut up and just go get the meal at the shopping mall.

without thinking.

(Although you both has selfishly taken your meal)

As a friend. I ordered 7pax food.

someone said to me "i thought they have eaten? Why order for them when they didnt think about us?"

my reply was, "its okay...we can be the bigger person...lets see how thick the skin of their faces are...since they claimed they are VERY FULL with their cheated lunch"

Okay. I dont fucking care because the money was forked out by everyone. You want to eat it despite after what you did. Go ahead.

Went to Escape Room-

Okay. Who am I kidding? With all these shits that happens...who am I kidding to still have the mood to blog about the trip? Shall I make things cut short and better on the point of why to I act that way at the end of the trip?

So I shall.

our last pit stop was on Monday, sunway lagoon.

after half a day of absolute fun swim activities.

i counted our money and we still have rm500++

Ate at Papa John and we walked around.

until we decided to have Bowling session to spend the $$$ off.

per person gets to bowl 2 times per turn.

but our lane seems to be having a probably.

it somehow skipped giving us actual marks and at times make us bowl 2 more times extra.

JY said "Get someone to fix it..." and the gang was all eyes on me. Fine. I stood at the counter for like 5 mins to tell the receptionist. When i went back to our lane. Jy said "dont need call the repairman lah"

I was like what? I called already...

"Dont need lah dont need lah...dont need so troublesome. Just play lah"

Okay.

number 1.

didnt you just told me to go ask someone to fix it? 

After the long wait.

the way you asked me no need to is as if I was troubling people when my intention in the first place was to get someone to fix the shit that you are uncomfort with.

it blew my patience off this time.

i tried and tried to hold my anger.

which i did instead of pointing out his faulty.

but my face shows the opposite.

sorry.

i cant hide my discomfort and displease emotions well from my expression due to all your doings o0o

it was my turn to bowl.

i threw harder (actually I three with nonetheless caring how many pins i may hit) because the fact I have eventually lost my mood after enduring all the shits I was getting during the trip.

the moment i turned around.

i saw jy giving eye hint to ivink and they look at me one kind

(Maybe cos the fact that I was showing dislike but I wonder if they are even smart enough to realize the things they have said and done?)

After bowling.

I was walking a bit ahead from the group but with Cyn closely behind me.

jy walked pass me and said "We are going home..." so i stopped..then i said okay...bye then..(still in a very pleasant tone when I actually starts burning on the inside)

then he said something that actually make my anger burst.

"The money"

In his very demanding tone.

as if i would take the rm259 and run away.

fuck that.

i took my wallet and counted and divided among the shares. After that. I walk off. Turned around because I was forgetting something.

"Byeee..." 

he look at me and said "Bye? I thought we are going to yam cha?"

Woah...hold it there.

You said it that you are going home.

and also when a person calls it to divide back he remaining money it means is to end the trip and everyone should get back their equal shares.

so wtf was that? Tell me.

am i wrong this time?

Dont give me the "she has princess attitude" cos i am definitely not.

If you guys are reading this. Good.

because a part of me still treats you both as a friend...i blogged this instead of coming upfront to you and tell you the dirty selfish things you guys did.

how would you feel if you were hungry and you waited for us 1st because we said we were coming but in the end we have eaten?

You will feel is NOTHING?

Dont give me bull-fucking-cock-shit.

please.

i have endure much bigger drama.

And i know what is lies.

you guys stop us from going to the lunch is because you have eaten and not hungry and without me...you cant enter the hotel room.

you didnt even care if Shirly has eaten or not.

you two secretly ate without telling.

even if you said to call buffet off and to be nice enough to inform that you have eaten and that we (The Ones) who have not, should get something to eat.

that will be tolerable.

^

This is enough to proven that you only care about yourself and instead of your friends around you.

may i ask.

what's the point right?

If you dont care about us. Why care so much to maintain in contact?

If you two thinks that just having each other companies is enough.

fine.

stay that way.

friends do come and go.

after reading this.

have some balls and guts come confront me with your reasons/excuses.

i would love to see and hear that.

if you just keep quiet.

fine.

your choice.

because we decided to do the same.

if you dont appreciate friendship like us do.

okay.

fair enough.

if a trip can make and shows me that ugly side of yours, I think is fair enough.

people around us are getting older.

friendship are hard to maintain.

appreciation should be kept and used.

but i dont think that is the case for you.

you once asked me "if she look for you, will you accept her back? After all she did...wont you hate her?"

Or 

"Why did you forgive her?"

TBH.

i kept trying to think...what do I actually hate about her...i do know why we stop contacting each other. But i dont hate her.

maybe cause the fact that when she look for me the last time...she and I admitted the faulty we did? Maybe cos people grew mature and know when and where to admit the faulty? The mistakes?

I appreciate friendship.

I made plans for trips to come.

despite the fact i dont get answers for my questions.

i keep trying my way to make it work.

schedule it for everyone's "YES"

because i do want us to hang out as a whole.

thus i know some of you dont give a fuck if it works out or not...i still put effort into making it come true for all of us.

because when we get together..

there will be laughter and relaxation.

this time.

shown me too much.

if you think you are wrong or right.

please.

have a self courage and come confront me.

if not.

bye.

im tired of the whole drama thing.

when are you people going to grow? 

Is it so hard to have balls and vaginas to come tell me what is wrong or maybe we have been wrong that you two have to be this way? To treat us this way?

If you have the guts to do it.

have the guts to embrace it.

Maybe.

im the only one who grew old?

Maybe.

im just too tired of dramas and become sensitive at all times and aware of my surroundings?

Maybe.

to others. Friends doesnt has to maintain long because friends comes and goes?

Maybe.

friends are NOT important?

Well. You are wrong. Everyone needs a friend.

oh..that explains why you have enough when you have each other. 

Let me tell you something.

even if you have a bf or a gf.

you will still need friends!

Unless you're a cockroach...okay. i know nothing about cockroach lifestyle.

=_=

Maybe.

you just dont care cos the fact that you are selfish and just care about you and yourself and nobody else?

Maybe.

i should not care much anymore.

because caring one problem because of others means you care about them or because they mean something to you.

But why should I care so much when the opponent does not?

Sometimes.

im so fucking tired dwelling all these and being the peacemaker or the forgiving one.

I used to care so much without limits and look at where it got me to...

everything...should have its own limit.

and I have mine too.

my Biggest guilt in 24 years of my life.

Maybe pouring out will ease the burden in my heart a bit(?) 

Though I strongly believe, I will never ever forget that moment..

My last moment with wangja...

My baby boy..

Before he passed on...his sister left 2 days earlier...between the two siblings..

I was more bias to the elder sis.

Because she's fat, fluffy and adorable.

To the point I felt so blessed to have this cute pig.

When I saw the stages she go through are the same of what i read on the net.

I was scared, I begged my dad to be by her side on her last stage...she eventually left.

I swore to myself to do anything and everything to keep wangja with me. I surf the net every hours...try all kind of methods...cos i do not trust the vet.

Today...I want to share something I have hidden in me...

When my puppy was at his last stage...

His head was on my lap while i sat on the floor.

He was just staring blankly at me.

I made him all kind of promises...i begged him to not be so naughty and stubborn to go look for his sister...that he should just grow old with me and we'll go find his sister together...that i promised him...i will fulfill it.

Maybe perhaps...i did too much wrong...God punishes me this way...

In one of the most painful process.

I had my left hand stroking his head...while my right hand held at his chest feeling his heart beat.

I could see him struggling...

I bend over to whisper "its okay to go...i promise i will come find you...but you must wait for me there okay? Because i will really really miss you..." they say dogs can hear...and they will let go if you let them go. Of course i do not want him to go...but i do not want him to suffer.

His heartbeat slows down every seconds...until it stops...it stops and i felt around his chest...hoping it was just my imagination...but his body turns cold...

I pray hard...that at least his sister will be there guiding him..because this silly fellow is a follower...when i brings him to the park...he would only stick closely to my dad's legs...

Never leave our sides..

I call him gay boy at times because he is so clingy to my dad...

I thought i was immune to accept this..

But writing this now proof otherwise...my tears just comes out automatically.

To others. He may just be a dog. A pet of mine.

But to me and my family.

He's the youngest kid in our family.

Dad treated him like it was his own son.

Every Friday when I came home to myself alone..i would slouch myself on the couch...he will automatically jump onto the couch...and put his chin on my shoulder...i would sometimes tease him by staring at him and ask him to stop acting cute...cos is disgusting...but because i felt the earnest love coming from him...how he just magically takes stress off from the entire week of mine...i could only thank God for it.

Every night i would ask him, "do you want your jacket?" He would lazily makes his way to me and put his head into the collar and let me help him wear the jacket...then i would kiss him on the forehead goodnight and tells him that i will see him in a couple more hours when im off to work.

If it wasnt for my family today..

...

I would have actually thought of committing a suicide...to go look for him... i know it sounds crazy but i just had those thoughts.

Maybe you think im crazy heck...maybe i really am...but no one can judge me and understand what im going through...

He is not just a pet...he is more than that.

I have grown to have him around.

Sometimes i would read my blog again when i am able to visit.

But i dont think i will for this particular one.

God.

How long do i need to live with this pain?

But life moves on. Really.

I may smile. Joke. And still my old self as on today and tomorrow and the day after.

I was doing so...

Just so my mind will lift off from thinking about my puppy for awhile there.

I think maybe because of all these times i have been ultra tough and firm.

He taught me how life and death is.

And finally. There's a reason for me to burst into tears.....

I'm not a good owner...I didnt even get to save my own puppy...but i am definitely someone who loves him very very much...even as on today...and in the future...

Im sorry, Wangja...Gongju...

As Stubborn As A......

So sleepy...typing my way while in the bus on my way to work.

Then there's this topic.

Normally people quote it as, 'As Stubborn As a Bull'..

But I didnt want to be called as bull hence I left the empty slot kekeke.

It happened two days ago, when I was having conversation with my lady boss...she was giving me instructions on what to do with the task.

I was looking at her...listening to her until...

*BAM*

Total pitch black.

Nope.

The electric still goes on.

The lights are still on.

My eyelids are still open.

What happened?

I lost my vision temporary.

Like i know my eyes are still open...

I still can hear her...

When it happens, I did get alarmed a bit.

But I told myself dont panic and see how long it last, eventually i slowly see the things in my office...it begins with a blurry ones but despite that, my vision goes back to normal.

I kind feel a bit worry there at the moment, not ashamed to say out in frank...but not being able to see, it is scary..

"Go see a doctor"

I understand and accept your kindness in the suggestion but I dont want to hear bad results.

Perhaps is nothing huge either.

I have low blood so probably being over exhausted could lead to such matter and if i was to see a doctor, she probably prescript me with more drugs to take and im not in for that.

But if I have to go.

I'll go.

And probably it relates to how I've been using my smartphone so much.

FINALLY! 

Outing this Sat!!! :)

Just. What. I. Need.

Xoxo

Mixed Emotions

I dont know where I should start or how should I even start.

Lol.

But i do know its been awhile since I last update my blog.

The amount of 'dust' collected is undeniable :p

I am still at mixed emotions and this regards to the passing of my dog. I think i am hurt so much this time due to the fact that something I love so much left me...he was just there..lying his head on my thighs..his eyes gazing into mine until the heartbeat of his where my hand was at...slowly fades away...his hot body turns cold and eventually he left me...though i cried...mourn and wail that i promised that i will walk with him and that he did not keep his promise for us to grow old together...he left.

I do not know how many humane people with the proper mind would say "he is just a dog" I can quite frankly say, that is very inhumane of you but I wont correct your thoughts. With such sayings...it proofs how much of to unkind you are but well, not everyone has passion for pets.

Till today...almost 2 weeks.

I still think of the What-Ifs this and that.

This is why I always pressed hard on the word, 

APPRECIATION.

Things will eventually become regretful and when you cant do anything regrets that you did not do what you can when you have the chance..

A little too late will make you live a life filled so stressful on the regrets part.

When it happens. I cant stop crying.

I knew I have to pour out my pain to someone.

I called a few people...i tried to open up a normal conversation but it ends up with a tearful call.

I think I may have actually surprise and shock those whom I called.

The tough Andrea image totally disappear.

Well. Of course. I have my weak parts too.

Dad told me to stay strong and that we should keep thinking of the good memories my dogs has given to me. Cos i often cry even when i sit quietly...watching tv...lol.

Enough of that.

Then there was insensitive people who actually will say something to change the way you live.

Tbh.

No one has any rights to tell another living soul on how to live their life.

Is not only annoying but is absurd as well.

Of course i will burst in your face with foul language especially when to me...you are just another pathetic stranger.

Yes...i may joke and all.

But what make you feel so comfortable with me and gives you any rights to think you can comment on my life? Fuck you.

"Taeyeon and Tiffany starts dating. You said it before that you will date if both of them does"

XD 

Did i???

Lol.

I guess allowing someone into my life is a bit...

Hard?

I am very independent...I had been supporting my family both mentally and physically.

And hello. I have my dad here to compare with all the guys coming after me.

Eventually they were strike out of the list.

Haha.

A few that I rejected but we still remained as friends....friends that we hung out still and I have no feelings of being uncomfortable around them. Probably cos we are dealing with mature people who respects each other decisions.

(Y)

Xian said she needs to meet us up soon for a yamcha session so she could laugh all over again and again.

^ pretty true.

I think I need it too.

Each of us has our own stress and by us hanging out together...even if its just half a day.

Things twisted into a worthwhile moment.

Talking about friends.

I have indulge myself with a few groups of friends. There's many kind of breeds.

Maybe i should pick out the one that disgust me most?

The one who leaves when there's a new one which they think are better than the old one.

Do you usually think so highly of yourself?

You think you made a great big sacrifice.

But heck you are also the one near the bottom of the pit.

But I always said and quote.

If you leave.

I dare you not to come back.

If you have the guts.

Dont come whimpering back.

Seriously.

Nuff said on this.

Super thanks to those who shows their real care to me during my crying needy period of time.

A few friends actually called to check on me after the tearful conversation.

They called and i was like "what laa" sounded like the old me haha and they will pause for a moment before replying "haha..no la..just call to say Hi to you cant is it?" But their voice betrays them...is obvious...they was checking out if im doing ok and quite frankly to admit, I am touched by this lil things that shows how much they do care. The other half text me as well.

Oh and yes.

Thanks to Andrew for fostering Augy even when is just a day (lol) I was so afraid that Augy might be depressed with the death of my other dog since he is beginning to act strange...and not even eating.

Is a dog we are talking about. I remember just asking Andrew if he could foster Augy while i get over my depression and my whole house cleanse throughly.

Not only he did not question with hesitation.

He said "ok. I will drop by at 5pm" looking at the clock it shows 430pm++ haha.

He never even ask me how long he needs to help. But augy...i guess he is too used of being around me... andrew whatsapp me showing even more depression side of Augy...who did not even drink or eat(!) I got panic but I learn that dog has deeper feelings than us humans.

So i told Andrew to bring augy back to me the following day.

I am so sorry Augy bite you =_=" haha.

Is the help and offers that people gives from their heart that counts.

Thank you.

stupid

People change.

Is not about how long they know each other..

But is how much you can trust one another.

I trusted wrongly.

So dont bothered to apologize.

Taeny & KF Shippers

How should I begin this?

Alright. This will mainly be the topic of Tiffany's relationship.

No. I am not going to bring myself to say THAT name.

For i dont even bothered to.

So lets just say, those of you whom shipped that couple..go ahead, but that doesnt means you have to make every single living sones to ship them. Cos that is just plain dumb.

What makes me laugh for a good time is seeing those tiny pathetic pest saying:

"YOU ARE NOT A REAL SONE IF YOU DONT SHIP KF"

I say double fuck you to that.

Since when did SNSD made you a judge? Or are you a soshi member to judge who is real and whats not? 

So lets just say...lets just say. An example.

If 1 of the soshi member doesnt bless or agree on kf relationship...does that makes her a fake soshi? Lol. Now. I am just trying to simplified your stupidity. Now you get it?

There's pros and cons.

We have our reasons why we dislike Nichkhun as it is the same of why you adore him. Why cant we dislike him? Sometimes bad things happened and we may blurt things out like "I hate you God...why me" 

Come on.

Your Nichkhun is not even the almighty.

So please.

You cant and shouldnt expect every single sones to like or accept that relationship. Because it is up to that one sole person to decide who they love/like or the other way.

Who are you to control the other thoughts?

Psycho.

Like the recent RunningMan.

Many of you blinded by passions said

"You guys just want him to answer idk so it gives you a reason to say he is not caring"

Er hello?

Talk to my double middle fingers.

He could've just shrugged it off with a shy smile and avoid it.

But its okay if he choose to answer it with a thoughtless mindless answer.

She is sleeping.

I find it awfully hilarious at his answer to it.

It was genuinely obvious that he answered without thinking and with whatever his brain can projects. And that just shows how much attention he wants to gain. By simply answering.

Is just like if my friend ask me "hey..what is your dog doing right now?"

And I'll go.. oh i think my dog is at home making some coffee for itself..enjoying his time break freedom.

Get it?

LMFAO.

1 thing for sure.

I realized this guy wants 1 thing.

Fame.

He jumps into any pit hole for that.

That brings us back to the time where he and Taeyeon arrived in Thailand airport.

She was there for her B ing event and as for him. I got no idea. Didnt care.

Taengangers and Sones were there.

Crowding the whole airport just to catch a glimpse of their Thai Prince.

And no. Thai Prince..is Taeyeon. 

Not that born and raise fella. Dont get it wrong ya ;)

So, that fella got out first.

he was amaze by the crowds.

(I was too)

(**applause to Thai Fans**)

He bows to the crowd and tweet "So many fans welcoming..I feel warm"

HOLD THERE A MINUTE BUDDY!!! ER WHUT!? 

you thought the crowds was for ya!?!??!

How hilariously embarrassing dude.

Ok. Come on. Give it to me.

you want to say he thought so?

But you know why?

Cos once again.

he shamelessly wants attention. And he would say or do anything without thinking twice

this dude is just dying for fame.

Many came and told me if i dont accept the relationship it means i dont love Tiffany enough.

i say you go and dig your way back into your mum's womb and stay there.

you dont know me so dont judge me.

those who knows me.

knows how well i am crazy for that girl.

"If you love someone. You accept it"

I do.

did i accept it?

Yes.

I accept it. But that doesnt means i have to ship them. And you think Tiff would give a fuck if 1 or 2 person doesnt accepts it? 

Er. No.

._.

Its her choice. Her relationship why do you think she give a fuck.

It is exactly how you fans should learn.

why you shippers want to give so many fucks as in to what other might be thinking or reacting?

Why do you want to fucking care so much?

6 years ago.

I fell in love with Tiffany Hwang herself.

not because of who she is with or who was with her. I love her for her personality and her eyesmile is a bonus to it.

6 years later.

I still love Tiffany Hwang as the person herself.

period.

i wont support her latest relationship. Cos i dont give it any damn. Neither she gives a damn if i agree in her relationship or not.

"SHE WILL BE SAD TO SEE HER FANS REACTING THAT WAY"

Oh wait. Kf shippers and other sones who thought that way. Wait a minute.

you didnt tell me you are not a human...you didnt tell me you are GOD for that only can explains properly of how you know how 1 idol really felt. Awwww.

oh wait.

you are just a fan.

like me

and everyone else.

so just SHUT UP.

I know most Locksmiths are sadden and upset by the news. I get it. I was too.

when the news were up.

i was so rage that i did something that i felt kind of regret when I calm down the next day.

(IF YOU ARE NOT A LOCKSMITHS, PLEASE ZIP YOUR CRAPPY MOUTH SHIT MAKERS FOR A MINUTE) 

I know how it feels to get crush by facts.

i know when hopes got crush.

that kind of feeling.

I have been through this.

but dear all. Remember what she said.

"To love is to learn how to let it go"

Come. Lets sing LET IT GO shall we :3

why not think of it this way?

At least we are lucky enough to witness a thing call 'real love' how beautiful a love life can be.

we seen it through TaeNy.

and we still see it.

Just like what she said "One picture can tells more" doesnt their gestures, expressions and eyesights does that? :)

I think a love life is more amazing is when one couple makes the people around them smile just by watching them and them not realizing it.

anyone can tell us anything.

but we should also remember the reason of why our fandom exist.

cos we are strong, supportive, caring, rush with passions of love from inside of us.

Key & Lock.

STEEL.

our heart should be as strong as a steel.

not the other way, marshmallow ;p

 Cheer up.

what saddens me is how some of you start turning your back to Tiffany. Is this it?

If she can still loves her, why not us too?

I know. Something is fishy.

but hey. 

10 years is not nothing.

if i am going to continue to proof of to why i think this whole sudden announcement of relationship is fishy... trust me. I need all day and when i does... Locksmiths will be all strong again. But...not today eh? I have stories to write later on x3

all i can say is.

Something made us believe.

he may use her fame to himself for all he wants.

but at the end of the day.

Taeyeon will still be the very one for her.

And come on shippers.

Tiffany is not pregnant. Neither she is planning to get married. No. Im not God. I didnt read her mind. This is all just plain observation.

sones.

who is Tiffany?

The member who has the most leadership roles playing among the girls. She is always there to maintain her group image.

marriage?

Pregnant?

You think she is that dumb to ruin something that she has build and maintain for so many years?

Dear KF Shippers.

i cant call you retards for that will only be an insult to definition of the word. You all are a normal human beings by why are each and everyone of you kf shippers so eager to show the stupidity that is inside of you.

desperate photoshop.

releasing fake rumors desperately.

SO GOD DAMN DESPERATE JUST LIKE YOUR NICHKHUN OPPA FOR HIS GROUP COMEBACK.

oh no wonder. 

That explains.

like idols. Like fans.

A bunch of desperado.

please.

if you are a kpop fan.

you should know.

This era.

is EXO.

your 2PM oppas are HISTORY.

and no. I am not even an exotic.

i am just plainly bluntly speaking what is real and happening. Hello. Come out from your cave once in awhile. It helps to update your brain.

dont just sit behind your screen and read what was tweet or re-tweet by your own gang.

salute to seunggi and khungho (< did i spell it right?? Sorry shikshin T.T)

It takes 1 real man to know how to protect his girlfriend. How to respect her fans and friends.

i guess your nikon oppa is still a little boy who is dying for desperate fame.

Until then.

Bye peepo ;)

P/S: 

If any of you who stays in KL wants to hang out or confront me..please do leave a comment here or my fb or my twitter or my ig or aff or anywhere you can get me.

you want to talk about kf? Want to correct me? Lol. I prefer face to face confrontation.

dont use your fake dp with fake name to come talk to me anon.

oh please.

grow some ovum and sperm people.

lost your guts.

only barking from behind screen?

Pfffffft

o0o

talk to da finga